Apparently you make a good broom.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
