love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
