arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
