I can tuck mytits in my pants
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
