the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
