yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Randomize
