he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Randomize
