we have pet lesbian snakes
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
