Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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