Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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