Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Randomize
