Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I touched a dick in church today
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
