from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
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