Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize