i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Randomize
