so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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