She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
