haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
