no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
The Olympian is in my bed
Randomize
