I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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