So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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