It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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