Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
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