Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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