I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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