Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Randomize
