I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize