She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
