Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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