I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
