Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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