New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize
