had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
