There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
