In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
