It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
