The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
