She said her name was "party"
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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