wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
it's not cheating when I paid for it
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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