Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize