Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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