i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
We don't watch enough power rangers
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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