I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize