I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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