your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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