I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
