I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize