How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
