I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
