Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
