Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
