Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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